I Left my Heart in Zihuatanejo...the reality of a Mexican Life

So much has happened since I last wrote.  But in order to feel "closure" and to truly convey the difference between experiencing Zihuatanejo as a tourist; those lucky carefree people who arrive for one or two weeks and live out their dream of a tropical paradise and; and our reality,  I have to write some closing thoughts for this season. 


The week before departure is always bittersweet.  This year, with only 9 weeks in total in our Mexican winter home, and the prospect of leaving the casita in the hands of our property manager and camarista to close, I felt less pressure in our last week than other years.  I didn't have to pack all of our possessions, and household items;  but simply ensure that our clothes, toiletries, jewellery and food were left packed up so that a single pre-arranged renter could enjoy the casita once more before it closes for the season.  

Instead we focused on seeing the people who matter the most to us during our time in Zihuatanejo and ensure that they each know how much they mean to us.  

When we returned to Zihua this year, it was Doraliz's 18th birthday and perhaps our last year of support and like all long distance relationships, there was the likelihood we would drift apart.  But happily and with great pride and hope on all parts, we will continue to assist Doraliz as she enters nurses' college this fall.  She's chosen a path that should provide her with the ability to continue to live with her family in their modest home, but also use her skills and intellect to obtain a career with a good future for employment.  Of course, the fact she has chosen my career is a bonus and we feel great optimism for at least the life of one young woman in a country where many have limited futures due to poverty, abuse and lack of education.

Our farewell family dinner at the traditional location of their choice, Viven Las Pizzas is a joyous affair. This year there was 12 of us in total with an age range of 87 to 1 month.    This is a large extended family, which now includes great grandma and Doraliz's new niece; all of whom will soon reside in the same house/store/storage center.  So much to cope with and so little resources, but we feel confident they will survive the "low season" and we are excited to keep updates via email, Skype and/or Facebook.  

Then there are our favorite restaurateurs, people who make us feel like special honored guests time and time again.  It's possible to think of them as simply appreciative of our business when times are so tough; but it doesn't feel like that.  It honestly feels as if we are "friends or family" and they will truly miss us.  They mean it when they call you friend and they go out of their way to make us feel appreciated each time we visit.  Jorge summed it all up "I'm sad when you leave, I'll miss you so much, I feel like my heart is breaking when all my friends go away".   Gracias Jorge for always, always treating us well and for enduring the tough restaurant business of Zihuatanejo. 

And of course there are my favorite musicians; a group of talented local Mexican guitarists, vocalists, percussionists and wind instrument players who entertain us each week in various venues.  We said goodbye to all.   This year has been especially fantastic for the opportunities to hear local music have expanded and now include at least 2 Playa La Ropa beachside cantinas, my favorite Pozole Restaurant Santa Prisca and Jose Cobo's Cantina de las Sirenas, which has chosen to open at 6 pm until 10 p.m every Monday for the early to bed Gringo set.   The real difference between a Mexican woman and a Gringa is that they can work all day, make every meal from scratch, manage a household of kids and parents and still dress up and go out looking fabulous at midnight to dance salsa with their appreciate husbands!   Spanish music is like medicine for the soul and mind.  It's rhythms and melodies move our bodies and our spirits in ways that not a single guitar player in the recent Zihuatanejo Guitarfest could evoke.  We will miss you all and hope that next season we find you all in our favorite venues, playing the music of Mexico! 








The last few years I've spent a lot of time with a woman who became a friend after our "partnership" in sewing began.  I first became friends with her Mother-in-Law, Isabel the "juice lady"...but soon extended my family bond to Lety and realized that both of these women coped in households damaged by alcohol abuse.  Lety is smart, articulate, talented and caring.  Her exuberant friendship has resulted in my owning items I could never expect to have or even seen...handmade macramed sandals, water bottle covers, hand-sewn cushions and handmade jewellery.  Every one of these has been given to me with no expectation of anything other than our friendship and a hope for the future.  I love my Mexican friends who base friendship on the here and now, and not on any hidden agenda.    This year I listened to her hope for a new future and I hope her dreams will come true; but I also know that there are so many barriers to her dream life, I applaud her ability to remain positive in the face of so much adversity. 

And in the face of huge adversity, I said goodbye to young Maria, the new Mom to Eric, her third newly born child.  She will raise her 3 children without any support from their father but I feel she will manage in the household of Lilly, her employer and "abuelita" who offers her a daily refuge where her children are safe, fed, and welcomed in to a home full of love and care.   Buena suerte Maria, you are loved by many! 


But perhaps most poignant was our final dinner in Zihuatanejo, spent in the company of fellow extranjero's and residents of La Ceiba,  Iris and Bob and a favorite Mexican amiga who has known us all for years.  A friendly person who has made so many persons' who visit Zihuatanejo see the local culture and cuisine, she has met persons who travel the world and share their experiences at her Cooking School.  This has opened a world that calls to her and her adult children.  I wish they could visit us in Canada and for their son and daughter to see the land of opportunity.  But like us, their hearts are inexorably linked to Zihuatanejo. 

 

So why does this Canadian continue to visit Mexico?  I can't say that I have the same reason as all the other Canucks who have escaped the frozen north, just to bask in the sun and warmth of Zihua.   Winter on Canada's west coast is not the same; I'm a "fake" Canadian in the eyes of our Eastern friends.  Life on Denman Island is a virtual paradise by comparison to the rest of Canada....but I know the answer.  It's not about the weather...it's the people we love in Zihuatanejo.  It's why I will continue to spend winters in a Third World country, riddled with crime and corruption.  Because being in Zihuatanejo is not only good for me, it's good for the people of Mexico that have welcomed us to their home with open arms.  I'm now a "Residente Permanente" of this large, diverse country, opening the doors to a future I can't yet know.  Nos vemos en Noviembre! 

Music, a metaphor for life; and closing the door one more time

The small city of Zihuatanejo is a world away from being considered multicultural.  In fact, walking the streets of the city, other than the winter immigration of mostly elderly Canadians and Americans who have chosen to spend some or all of their winter here, one sees a sea of Mexican faces.  Some are dark and may reflect their long ago African roots; the descendents of African slaves who made their way to the Costa Grande decades ago.  Others are fair of skin, based on their intact Spanish ancestry. 


The strolling street and beach vendors are a homogenous group of Indigenous women and men who make their way to the coast to sell the variety of crafts and wares often produced in the mountainous interior and sold here during the "high season".  Small statured, tanned leathered skin and some speaking their indigenous dialects,  they are a group unto themselves; not integrated into the mainstream of the city. 


But most residents of Zihuatanejo are an attractive mix of indigenous native Mexican and Spanish heritage.  Black haired, tawny skinned and dark eyed, they are the smiling faces of the children and youth who are the hope of Mexico. 

People in Zihuatanejo aren't exposed to the concept of a "multicultural society" like Canada or America.  Many haven't travelled beyond the borders of the city, or perhaps at best the state of Guerrero.  Born and raised in the same city as their parents; they have limited awareness of the world outside of that portrayed in movies or television. 

So when the yearly Zihuatanejo International Guitarfestival in it's 12th year invites musicians from around the world to this small beachside village, what do locals think?   Mexican music is melodious, voices are rich and warm, sounds are soothing and many are "love songs".  How do locals react when they are exposed to music as diverse and at times as challenging to listen to as scorch folk, finger picking guitar, slide guitar, rock a billy and Pakistan sufi? 








In the words of Juan, the young man who is one of the videographers of the festival, "it's a chance to hear all the ways music is played".  It's music in a multicultural mode in a land of Spanish guitarristos!  It's vicarious travel for those Mexicans who have decided to attend the festival and hear what has brought so many tourists here in the lull between winter "high season" and the upcoming Semana Santa. 

And this week, with our music festival guest Irena (herself a Scot, descendant of Polish immigrants, who has made Canada her home and is an expert in Spanish music and particularly the flamenco), we are readying ourselves for our annual pack up and trip back to Canada.  We are making our last trips to favorite restaurants, last walks on favorite beaches and last chances to say goodbye and hasta luego to our friends.   We,  the Canadians with our Mexican dog Cori who  has the dream life of  a home in Canada where the air is clear and people have so much. 

There's many things that I miss about life here when I return to Canada.  Color, music, food, warm air and a beautiful ocean...but we know we are blessed.  We live in a country where diversity is the norm and our access to the multicultural world isn't limited to the 10 days of an "international" guitar festival. 

Friday is our last chance to see the little village of Barra de Potosi that is opening it's doors for it's second annual street fair.   It's old world Mexico opening it's doors and heart to the new world of diversity!